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SubscriptionsSites I Read
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| lost connectionmaybe i can be free.
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| i can barely breathe and your goddamn words keep destroying my soul
I'm a bit lost. I'm not sure what I should be doing and I can't find a way to make anything seem real. Anxiety is kicking my ass and I don't know how to make it stop -- other than new medication, and I don't want to go that route. But I'm going to have to.
There is a position at SES for an interpreter. It starts out at only $9.00 an hour, but it is full time and incredibly easy, we all know this. I really think I should do it, but my only problem would be with school. I don't know how I would manage to do both. Well, it's simply really: I couldn't. Not during the week at least. And I would have to quit my current job. I need to go out to the school and speak to Sally. Because if I were to do this...
Think of the possibilities.
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| saviour.I need to run, flee, go, anything. All of the noise is becoming too much for me to handle. I've taken a pill and I'm hoping for it to kick in soon. If not, I'm not sure what is going to happen. I'm just so anxious, upset, everything. Some dude is here and I have no clue who he is. I tried to sell a book yesterday and it didn't work. I'm hungry, but I've already eaten. I don't want to sleep but I'm not sure what else there is to do. I can't decide what shirt to wear. The most trivial things are bothering me. I need to get back into the doctor, and soon. I can't wait until September, especially not with school coming up. I can manage this. Somehow.. | | |
| the oneIt started out as a feelingI'm a little drunk. I broke open the bottle and said screw it, I'm never going to see you again. I'm pretty upset, I guess, tonight's been weird. Apparently I'm a slut because I like a girl, but I don't give a fuck. Like, I see no point in trying to convince her otherwise, so why bother. I'm going to do what makes me happy and if it turns out bad, so what? At least I was happy.Work tomorrow, 9 AM. I need to get paid, soon, or my bills are going to gain interest. I do not wish for this. I want to be in California right now. I have such plans, indeed I do. August 4th is almost here, and I can't wait. | | |
| transcodingI've often wondered what makes an addiction so thrilling. The thought is as much of a trigger as the action, wrapping one's mind in but a web of corruption. Because that's what people become, a source of corruption. Things do not destroy. Yes, bacteria breaks down substances. Degradation occurs. But when life is the reason, the cause is lost. It becomes something that one cannot control: rage. That rage burns and destroys until there is nothing left but a new start, or an end.
I'd like to create a new path. One in which we do not regret.
And as tides turn, oceans rise, and we lose sight of the land we once called home. | | |
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